Leadership is NOT Position

The Mythical Leader: 7 Myths of Leadership

Misunderstanding Leadership

My friend Ron Edmondson is a pastor, author, blogger, and consultant. After reading his leadership book The Mythical Leader: Seven Myths of Leadership, I followed up with him to discuss the many misunderstandings people have about leadership.

“Leadership is influence.” -John Maxwell

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Avoid the Boss Mentality

I often say that leadership is personal, not positional. Myth number one hits this immediately. What are some of the problems with the “boss has ruled” mentality?

I so hate the word boss. Maybe because I’ve had one and, no, I never want to be seen as one. Frankly, from a purely practical standpoint, the “boss has ruled” mentality simply doesn’t work. It might get the job done for a while, but it will wear people out over time. We don’t get the best people have to offer because they will only do what has to be done to meet the “boss’s” expectation. But, I think there is a bigger reason. It’s wrong. At least from my Biblical perspective, we are all – regardless of title or position – ultimately to be servants of others.

“The culture the leader creates impacts the feedback a leader receives.” -Ron Edmondson

Myth number two says that if you’re not hearing complaints, everyone must be happy. Tell us a little more about this observation.

I’ve learned even in the best organizations and on the healthiest teams, the leader only knows what they know. And, people may be either hesitant to share what they are really feeling for fear, or retribution or they assume the leader already knows the problems. I go through seasons, as the leader, where I’m simply getting the required things done. I’m traveling a lot. I’ve got a lot of projects on my plate. If I’m not careful, I can assume silence means agreement. I must consistently be asking good questions to make sure I know the true pulse of the organization.

7 Myths of Leadership

Myth 1: A position will make me a leader.

Myth 2: If I am not hearing anyone complain, everyone must be happy.

Myth 3: I can lead everyone the same way.

Myth 4: Leadership and management are the same thing.

Myth 5: Being the leader makes me popular.

Myth 6: Leaders must have charisma and be extroverts.

Myth 7: Leaders accomplish by controlling others.

Reblogged from: Skip Pritchard

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I believe other people are out to help me!

I believe other people are out to help me!

My academic background is in clinical psychology. But I always wondered, why do we focus exclusively on human pathology and dysfunction? What about the positive side, the moments when human beings are at their absolute best? It seems we can give everyone a label, categorizing every action as a dysfunction of some kind. My wife is an “enabler” because she enjoys helping people, I’ve been accused of being in “denial” because I choose to focus on the good in my past rather than the bad. My son was “ADHD” because he found it hard to sit in a traditional classroom. Some of my best friends have been prescribed Prozac to calm their unusual and rapid flow of ideas.

But personally, I have decided to take the title of “inverse paranoid.” This is a term that has been used by Dr. Richard Bimler, W. Clement Stone, Brian Tracy and others. As you know, a paranoid person thinks everyone is out to get him. That person is typically suspicious, fearful, and panicked that people are trying to do him harm.

I tend to believe that everyone is out to bring me happiness and to help me reach my goals. And I try to do the same for them. To have a positive attitude does not mean that problems and frustrations disappear. But I’m confident I find solutions quicker as a result of my inverse paranoia. I believe the world is plotting to do me good! — Tweet This

If you’d like to join me in my delusion, here are some tips:

1. When obstacles appear, don’t assume “everyone hates me.” Rather, see them as opportunities to grow and succeed in new ways. Without challenges you will never improve.

2. Remember a time in your life when a “disaster” opened the door to something good.

3. If you lose your job, expect that you’ll now find your dream job with better pay.

4. If your back hurts at the office, expect to develop a better ergonomic chair design that will make you millions.

5. Reach for the “opportunity clock” in the morning – erase the memory of an “alarm clock.”

6. When the weather forecaster says there’s a 30% chance of rain, recognize that means there’s a 70% chance of sunshine!

7. When the county shuts down your Sanctuary, ask “What does this make possible?”

And yes, I rather like my delusion. Please don’t prescribe a pill to make me “normal” or send me to an institution to correct my thinking.

Reblogged from: 48DAYS

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3 Times as Much

Complaining has the potential to sabotage the morale, engagement and culture of your team, family, group etc. It not only sabotages your own happiness and success but of everyone around you. Most people complain for two main reason: 1. They feel powerless, 2. It’s a habit. Some people complain about others, because there is something deep inside them which is unresolved. They are unhappy creatures. It is possible to stop focusing on everything YOU deem wrong with others, and focus on thinking correctly according to scriptures. Some people can think correctly, but their delivery or approach to others is lacking kindness, and real godly love. Here are some helpful tips.

1. Practice Gratitude. Research shows that when we count three blessings a day, we get a measurable boost in happiness that uplifts and energizes us. It’s also physiologically impossible to be stressed and thankful at the same time. Two thoughts cannot occupy our mind at the same time. If you are focusing on gratitude, you can’t be negative. You can also energize and engage others by letting them know you are grateful for them and their contributions to your life.

2. Praise Others. Instead of complaining about what others are doing wrong, start focusing on what they are doing right. Praise them and watch as they grow as a result. Of course, point out their mistakes so they can learn and grow, but make sure you give three times as much praise as criticism.

3. Focus on Success. Start a success journal. Each night before you go to bed, write down the one great thing about your day. The one great conversation, accomplishment, or win that you are most proud of. Focus on your success, and you’ll look forward to creating more success tomorrow.

4. Let Go. Focus on the things that you have the power to change, and let go of the things that are beyond your control. You’ll be amazed that when you stop trying to control everything, it all somehow works out. Surrender is the answer.

5. Pray. Scientific research shows that daily prayer reduces stress; boosts positive energy; and promotes health, vitality, and longevity. When you are faced with the urge to complain or you are feeling stressed to the max, stop, be still, plug-in to The Ultimate Power, and recharge.

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36 Ways to Make a Positive Impression in Less Than 10 Seconds

36 Ways to Make a Positive Impression in Less Than 10 Seconds

Reposted from LITTLE THINGS MATTER as written by Todd Smith

There are literally hundreds if not thousands of little things we can do to raise the bar in our professional and personal lives. So many of these things are easy to do and can be accomplished in less than 10 seconds. They just require an intentional effort.

What is CRITICAL to understand is that your ultimate success, fulfillment and happiness will come from doing the little things that matter.

As entrepreneur and best selling author Harvey Mackay said, “Little things don’t mean a lot. They mean everything.”

Here is a short list of 36 things you can do in less than 10 seconds that will make you a better person, enhance your self-image and improve the quality of your life.

1. Make it a point to say the words ”I love you” to the people in your home every single day.
2. Offer a friendly authentic smile- a great smile radiates warmth, puts people at ease and makes you likable.
3. Make comfortable eye contact- your eyes send messages; establishing and maintaining eye contact with people demonstrates confidence, respect, and genuine interest.
4. Use someone’s name – everyone likes to hear and see his or her name.
5. Acknowledge people- smile and say hi to the people around you.
6. Express your appreciation- say “thank you” to everyone who does something for you even if they are paid to do it.
7. Be unselfish and put others first- it could be as simple as holding the door open for someone.
8. Offer a word of encouragement- sometimes this is all a person needs to build confidence and take the next big step. This is big!
9. Accept responsibility when you are wrong- it’s the sign of a person with character.
10. Be friendly- it lifts the attitude of others and is the #1 factor in being likable.
11. Maintain a positive mental attitude- your attitude is a choice and that choice is 100% within your control.
12. Be kind and considerate- to people you know as well as strangers.
13. Be like a dog and be the first to greet people- it helps new people entering the room feel more comfortable and demonstrates your interest in them.
14. Offer people you meet a warm greeting- this will set the tone for the entire encounter.
15. Say please- make it a habit to use the word please EVERY TIME you ask someone to do something for you even if they are paid to do it.
16. Get up and walk into the other room to speak to someone, rather than yelling.
17. Put the toilet seat down.
18. Turn your head and cover your mouth when you sneeze or cough.
19. Improve your body posture- poor posture is an indication of low self-esteem.
20. Say goodbye- make a good last impression.
21. Offer a proper handshake- a good, firm handshake demonstrates confidence and makes a good impression.
22. Give someone a hug- a hug is a sign that you really care for the other person.
23. Proof your email, text or post- this is an important component of portraying a professional online brand.
24. Click the LIKE button on someone’s Facebook post- it’s an easy way to demonstrate interest.
25. Turn off your phone in meetings- even though your phone may not make sounds, your eyes and attention will be diverted from the other people in attendance and your lack of attention demonstrates disrespect.
26. Repeat your phone number twice when leaving a voicemail- speaking slowly and repeating your phone number will make you stand out.
27. When scheduling appointments use the other person’s time zone- this avoids misunderstandings or missed opportunities.
28. Speak with life and energy in your voice- no one likes to be around people who are “dead, dull and lifeless.”
29. Walk with a bounce in your step- it’s evidence of an energetic attitude that ultimately leads to success.
30. Turn off the notifications that are bugging those around you.
31. Write things down- it prevents you from forgetting things that are important.
32. Say something positive to others about another person- reverse gossip.
33. Congratulate your opponent- good sportsmanship is evidence of leadership.
34. Introduce yourself- be proactive and introduce yourself to people whom you have never met.
35. Look for the good in others and tell them what you see- you have the ability to bring out the best in people, especially when they may not know it themselves.
36. Hold in that fart- the pain will go away in less than 10 seconds.

J

As you can see, each of these tips is easy to do. They don’t require any formal education or financial investment. We can begin to incorporate them into our lives this very minute. All we need is to be conscious of them and be willing to take 10 seconds to do them.

Let me encourage you to print out this list and put an asterisk beside the ones you are committed to working on. Track your results and see how you do.

This is just a small sampling of the things we can do in less than 10 seconds to make a positive impression on others. What are some other simple things we can do in less than 10 seconds? I look forward to reading them in the comments section below this post.

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Matt Walsh: If you find it easy to be a Christian, you probably aren’t one – TheBlaze

The danger comes when we lose sight of how luxurious our situation is, particularly compared to how Christians elsewhere in the world and throughout history have fared. If we delude ourselves on this point, we may think that our religious convictions have somehow been tested and proven when a guy we knew in high school unfriends us for posting spiritual memes on Facebook. I’ve more than once found myself in conversation with a Christian who recounts such a trauma as if it were her personal Passion. She hit the tiniest speed bump because of her religion and now she looks in the mirror and sees Joan of Arc.

http://www.theblaze.com/contributions/matt-walsh-if-you-find-it-easy-to-be-a-christian-you-probably-arent-one/

Watch “U.S. Senate Chaplain Dr. Barry Black full remarks at National Prayer Breakfast (C-SPAN)” on YouTube

There are Saints in Caesars household!

I love when he quoted from one of my favorite hymns!
You absolutely have to watch this message.
All of it.
Powerful, compelling, and moving presentation of the Gospel of Jesus Christ.
Delivered at the National Prayer Breakfast on Thursday morning in Washington, by the Chaplain of the Senate to the President of the United States.
It was delivered to more than 4,000 government, business and religious leaders from all over the United States and from more than 160 countries around the world.
Reminds me of when Peter Marshall preached to Congress about Malachi 4..

The missing ingredient—genuine humility

Is Humble Leadership about How You Act or Who You Are?

January 9, 2017

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Leaders can be taught to act humbly. But humility is far more powerful when it’s connected to character.

Today’s post is by Bernie Swain, author of What Made Me Who I Am (CLICK HERE to get your copy).

Since the financial crisis and great recession deflated a lot of big egos, humility has come to the fore as an essential trait of successful leaders. The arrogant, my-way-or-the-highway swaggerer has given way to the empathetic, humble servant. A number of academic studies confirm that it’s a good thing. Researchers at the University of Washington Foster School of Business, for example, found that the most effective leaders tend to be humble people.

That’s certainly been my experience over more than 25 years at the Washington Speakers Bureau. We represented some of the most well-known leaders in the world—among them, three of the past four presidents of the United States, four prime ministers of Great Britain, five U.S. secretaries of state, and countless government and military leaders, journalists, authors, and sports legends. With few exceptions, I’ve found that the common thread in their character is humility.

That isn’t idle flattery. For the past ten years, I’ve interviewed more than 100 of those clients about what made them who they are. In case after case, the stories they told me about what shaped them involved humble circumstances and a deep sense of gratitude to the people who made a difference in their lives.

Take James Carville, whose fierce intelligence and relentless drive helped put an obscure Arkansas governor in the White House. James grew up in a small Louisiana town that was home to the world’s largest research and treatment facility devoted to leprosy. The decisive influences in his life: a mother who sold encyclopedias, a father whose dedication to serving his neighbors led him to keep his country store in business long after the big grocery chains made it unprofitable, and a large community of African-Americans subject to injustice that was obvious to the teenage James.

Or consider Alan Greenspan, the former Chairman of the Federal Reserve. He was an aspiring musician—a Juilliard graduate, a multi-instrumentalist, and a saxophonist traveling with a swing band. But one of his bandmates was Stan Getz, who would go on to become one of the most accomplished jazz musicians of his generation. His playing put Alan’s in the shade. “All I had to do was listen to Stan,” he told me, “to know I would never be that good.” He gave up music, but the recollection of that disappointment helped keep him balanced thereafter.

Or take Condoleezza Rice. From her you’ll hear no self-congratulatory talk of pulling herself up by her own bootstraps—the kind of talk that sometimes masquerades as humility. Instead, she says, “Whenever I need strength and inspiration, all I have to do is be reminded that I was lifted on some very strong shoulders.”

In today’s discussion of humble leadership, that’s the missing ingredient—genuine humility.

A spate of recent articles from places like Harvard Business Review, Fast Company, and Forbes offer some sound, common-sense advice about how to practice humility: admit mistakes, listen to other points of view, confess that you don’t have all the answers, seek feedback, and focus on the needs of others. The research shows that such behavior inspires greater employee loyalty and boosts job performance.

But that’s about how you act, not who you are—behavior, not character. Imagine how much more powerful that behavior can be when it flows from the deepest wellsprings of character, as it does with so many of the leaders I interviewed and have come to know over the years. They don’t need to think about humility consciously; it’s second nature to them. Jim Collins, the author of Good to Great, long ago identified what he called “Level 5 leaders”—the highest level in his hierarchy—as those who combine personal humility with fierce professional will.

What about the rest of us? Can you acquire a humble character by changing your behavior—fake it till you make it, as they say in 12-step programs. That’s what much of the leadership literature suggests. But maybe you don’t need to fake it. Perhaps your humility is already there but lying dormant, waiting be roused. An exceptional leadership coach, for example, can help you tap into the really meaningful people, places, and moments in your life buried under the years of forgetfulness.

Or you can try beginning with introspection. Looking inward isn’t easy in the age of social media and self-promotion, when we’re urged to develop our personal “brand” instead of our character. Our lives are too busy, our attention spans too fractured by the pings of mobile devices and the addictive glow of the screen. But it’s worth a try. And you have nothing to lose but a false sense of pride.

Think of it this way: Winston Churchill once described a political rival as “a modest man who has much to be modest about.” Then ask yourself what you have to be modest about.

– Bernie Swain is co-founder and Chairman of Washington Speakers Bureau, author of What Made Me Who I Am (CLICK HERE to get your copy) and today’s foremost authority on the lecture industry. Over the past 35 years, he has represented former US Presidents, American and world leaders, journalists, authors, business visionaries, and sports legends. Follow him on twitter @Swain_Bernie or via his website www.bernieswain.com.

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Reblogged from HERE

"Leading the thinking requires seeing beyond current probabilities to create future possibilities." – Mike Figliuolo Click to tweet this quote

"You are not above any work you have the skills to do. Acting like you are earns you nothing but disdain."
– Mike Figliuolo
Click to tweet this quote

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In a Family, Parents’ Relationship Comes First

In a Family, Parents’ Relationship Comes First

I recently asked a married couple who have three kids, none of whom are yet teens, "Who are the most important people in your family?"

Like all good moms and dads of this brave new millennium, they answered, "Our kids!"

"Why?" I then asked. "What is it about your kids that gives them that status?" And like all good moms and dads of this brave new millennium, they couldn’t answer the question other than to fumble with appeals to emotion.

So, I answered the question for them: "There is no reasonable thing that gives your children that status." I went on to point out that many if not most of the problems they’re having with their kids-typical stuff, these days-are the result of treating their children as if they, their marriage, and their family exist because of the kids when it is, in fact, the other way around. Their kids exist because of them and their marriage and thrive because they have created a stable family.

Furthermore, without them, their kids wouldn’t eat well, have the nice clothing they wear, live in the nice home in which they live, enjoy the great vacations they enjoy, and so on. Instead of lives that are relatively carefree (despite the drama to the contrary that they occasionally manufacture), their children would be living lives full of worry and want.

This issue is really the heart of the matter. People my age know it’s the heart of the matter because when we were kids it was clear to us that our parents were the most important people in our families. And that, right there, is why we respected our parents and that, right there, is why we looked up to adults in general. Yes, Virginia, once upon a time in the United States of America, children were second-class citizens, to their advantage.

It was also clear to us-I speak, of course, in general terms, albeit accurate-that our parents’ marriages were more important to them than their relationships with us. Therefore, we did not sleep in their beds or interrupt their conversations. The family meal, at home, was regarded as more important than after-school activities. Mom and Dad talked more-a lot more-with one another than they talked with you. For lack of pedestals, we emancipated earlier and much more successfully than have children since.

The most important person in an army is the general. The most important person in a corporation is the CEO. The most important person in a classroom is the teacher. And the most important person in a family are the parents.

The most important thing about children is the need to prepare them properly for responsible citizenship. The primary objective should not be raising a straight-A student who excels at three sports, earns a spot on the Olympic swim team, goes to an A-list university and becomes a prominent brain surgeon. The primary objective is to raise a child such that community and culture are strengthened.

"Our child is the most important person in our family" is the first step toward raising a child who feels entitled.

You don’t want that. Unbeknownst to your child, he doesn’t need that. And neither does America.

-from: John Rosemond Newsletter www.rosemond.com

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